When you start on the fertility journey – loathe this term, but nothing else quite captures the unexpected roadblocks, accidents, deadends, wrong turns and suddenly parts of clear sailing that you find yourself experiencing – you may need to make a choice on which fertility clinic you choose.
This is where it gets a bit like internet dating (which I also have far too much experience of…)
In internet dating – I am from the pre-tinder swipe era – you start with great hope (well, in the main, I’ll come to that later), provide all the information the site asks for, and wait…
For many, internet dating is a numbers game, you try various dates, and hopefully meet someone you want to go on more with (or eventually marry, #justsayin’), but for some it just doesn’t work with the first site they try and so they start looking at others.
OK, so maybe I have dragged this analogy out enough. What I am trying to articulate is that when you look at a clinic for IUI/IVF/Donor etc most people will probably look at:
- cost (but beware the many many hidden costs in the small print – its generally 2x what they promote!)
- location (either convenient to get to or a destination where you might get some sun…)
- pregnancy and birth rates per age
What many probably don’t look at so closely is reviews. You should. Reviews for clinics and how they handle patients is really important to consider – these people will be looking at your bits multiple times, you want to feel that they have your best interests and health at heart.
Ignore the ‘they didn’t get me pregnant so therefore they are shit’ reviews (whilst this may be true, your situation is not theirs and fertility is still a dark art), but do pay attention to
- cleanliness of the clinic
- attentiveness/responsiveness of the clinic to messages or whilst being treated
- any reviews which mention behaviours that would raise a red flag
Back to the analogy of dating sites… so site one didn’t work. With a little less enthusiasm you sign up for site two, this must be the one right? Er, no. Site three, maybe we’ll be more open for the type of match we are looking for? Good god no! Abort, abort! (in retrospect maybe not the best word). One more go maybe? This is hard work…
Anyway, back to clinics. In my case, so far I am on to clinic #4 in 4 different countries across 4 different years (2021 will be year 5 of clinics). I am tired of the circus, but obviously still hopeful/desperate enough to keep trying. My clinic experience can be summed up as:
- #1 – meh – a state health service, one size fits all with the offered treatments. Professional but not warm – 15months of treatment
- #2 – private clinic – constant adaptation of offered treatment. Warm and personal service (probably as I was there so long!) – 2 years of treatment
- #3 – private clinic – oh good lord. READ THE REVIEWS BEFORE YOU CHOOSE. Rude, strange, borderline unprofessional, lack of support, just AGH! – 9 months of treatment
- #4 – private clinic – so far so good. Professional, expert guidance, personalised plan – 3 months of treatment (so far)
And there you have it. Don’t choose the first guy/clinic with the pretty face (or nearby beaches) they might not be exactly what they purport to be. I may write up more details of clinic #3 because, just, wow.